friday, two weeks ago. nag-decide na lang kami bigla na lumayo muna sa sibilisasyon. walang plano plano, in-impake ko lang sa maliit na gym bag ang aking rash guard at board shorts, tatlong tshirt, dalawang shorts, mga underwear at kailangang toiletries.

destination baler. a place of happy memories.

sabado ng hating gabi, lumayag galing ng maynila. pagkatapos ng 6 hours na biyahe sa joy bus (pinaka-magandang nasakyan ko dito sa pinas), dumating kami sa paroroonan. medyo masama pa nga panahon, buong araw ng umulan. walang magawa, wala rin namang kelangan gawin. steady at relax lang. food trip maghapon.

madaling araw ng lunes napagpasyahan kong maglakad lakad sa dalampasigan. alone time. my moment. hindi ko alam kung bakit pero yung umagang yon tatatak na sa kin habang buhay. ang ganda ng mundo nung mga oras na iyon. yung pag silip ng araw sa mga ulap, yung tunog ng mga alon, yung solo kong paglalakad habang nakikinig sa "so long, so long". mga bagay na walang koneksyon sa isa't isa pero dadalhin ko sa mahabang panahon dahil nakaramdam lang ako ng kapayapaan sa mga oras na iyon. ganon naman yata talaga ang buhay. minsan, hindi mo kelangan ng explanation sa mga bagay na nagbibigay kasiyahan sa iyo. mas mainam kung ie-enjoy mo na lang ang bawat saglit kahit na walang logic.

nung umagang iyon paulit ulit lang nagfa-flash sa utak ko yung mga quotes na nabasa ko dati sa isang fan video ng so long, so long. galing sa libro ni d. miller.

"And so my prayer is that your story will have involved some leaving and some coming home, some summer and some winter, some roses blooming out like children in a play. My hope is your story will be about changing, about getting something beautiful born inside of you about learning to love a woman or a man, about learning to love a child, about moving yourself around water, around mountains, around friends, about learning to love others more than we love ourselves, about learning oneness as a way of understanding God.

No, life cannot be understood flat on a page. It has to be lived; a person has to get out of his head, has to fall in love, has to memorize poems, has to jump off bridges into rivers, has to stand in an empty desert and whisper sonnets under his breath...

We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and the resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn't it?"